Now for the hard part...

In some areas of my life, I am extremely fortunate. Today, I came out to my brother. Although a bit shocked and surprised, he is behind me all the way. He actually congratulated me on coming out. My little brother and I were really close as kids, and we each have held secrets for each other for many years. I had expected him to be the most accepting of all my family from the beginning, and he has lived up to my expectations. He said he would be there for me mo matter what. His unconditional acceptance of me is just awesome.

My dad and I had a few private moments today and were able to discuss things a little. He said that it is still soaking in that i'm gay, but he is totally supportive and will always be there for me no matter what. I told him that I told my brother and that it went well (as my dad expected). I told my dad how grateful I am for him and my brother. He said there is no need to be grateful, that he and my brother loved me unconditionally. He added that unconditional meant just that. They would love me mo matter what. I asked my dad about how he thought some of my other relatives would react. In particular, how my fav aunt (my dads sis) would react. She knows my dad has been worried about me a lot and actually asked my dad if he thought I might be gay. Winner winner chicken dinner. So following that, he said she would be completely cool with it. In fact, he said most of the relatives on his side of the family would likely be cool. So, my aunt will likely be next to know.

Now that the easy part is out of the way (ha ha), on to the really hard part...telling my mom and sister. My sis is hard to read. After talking to my bro, I get the feeling my sis would be ok after a while. She appearantly has some gay friends, and so is ok with gays. It just might take her a while to adjust to thinking of me as gay. However, she tells my mom everything and so I can't tell my sis until I'm ready for my mom to find out. My mom will freak out on me. Of that I'm convinced. She may still love me, but will never support me and will insist that I'm sick and need treatment. This is getting kinda hard now.

The other difficulty will me in finding a boyfriend. My bro insists that I have heaps going for me and that I will find some one to love who will love me. So, when I get home, winning CPB's (cute pizza boy's) heart will become my priority. I will gladly accept any help anyone can offer in that arena. I have zero experience with flirting and talking to guys I like.

Thank you all from the bottom of my heart for all the support you've given me and for your comments. Well, I'm exhausted and need sleep.

Laterz.